Well, I feel like today I have made a giant step in my future teaching carrer. I had my first student insult. I knew this day would come, but not during my student teaching. Luckily...it was pretty hilarious. I know when other teachers get insulted they get called all sorts of names!! But I bet they have never been called a "desk"!! Haha. Here is the situation (the student's name has been changed):
I am explaining the exam to the class when I see Tony still has his hat on, I told him to take it off. He refused. Then I told him to put it under his chair, he proceded to put it in his lap and I told him again to put it under his chair (because of cheating). Finally I told him again, put it under your chair and not just your desk! And he yells back "Well....YOU'RE A DESK!!!" I was in awe! hahaha....so in my surprise, I didn't know if I should laugh or take it seriously. So I sent him outside until I figured out what I was going to say to him... Here is our conversation:
Me: Tony, do you know why I sent you outside?
Tony: Yeah
Me; Why?
Tony: Because I called you a desk (lol!)
I won't go into the rest of our conversation but it is hilarious now that I think back at a student calling me a desk. I know it isn't a real big deal but I decided to deal with it before he thinks it's o.k. to call me something else, probably worse. Anyway, I guess I am a desk. Hope that it's a good thing.
Almost there....
I am not very good at blogging anymore. I still need to update my Peru trip from the summer. Not to mention our California and Utah trip. Oh well! So I thought I would just fill you in on what we have been up to since school started up again.
Brian is in school and working 2 jobs. He is very busy and rarely has time to hang out...I can't wait until December! Speaking of December, that is when Brian and I FINALLY graduate from U of A. We are both in our last semester of school and can't wait to see what is in store for us a year from now. Anyway, I am not taking classes at U of A this semester because I am student teaching at CDO (Canyon Del Oro HS). It is in Northwest Tucson. I love teaching and am having a lot of fun! It is a really great experience and am anxious to one day have my own classroom. Brian and I have no plans for remaining in Tucson after graduation. I think we are going to just travel next semester....I will let you know how that goes.
And yes, I make my students call me Senora Mortenson.
Brian is in school and working 2 jobs. He is very busy and rarely has time to hang out...I can't wait until December! Speaking of December, that is when Brian and I FINALLY graduate from U of A. We are both in our last semester of school and can't wait to see what is in store for us a year from now. Anyway, I am not taking classes at U of A this semester because I am student teaching at CDO (Canyon Del Oro HS). It is in Northwest Tucson. I love teaching and am having a lot of fun! It is a really great experience and am anxious to one day have my own classroom. Brian and I have no plans for remaining in Tucson after graduation. I think we are going to just travel next semester....I will let you know how that goes.
And yes, I make my students call me Senora Mortenson.
Funny
I am alive...still procrastinating the rest of the Peru pictures. They will be up one day. I started Student Teaching. this last week. It is a lot of work, and I am alredy tired, but worth it becuase I love it!
So I received this email this past week and thought it was hilarious. Hopefully it makes you laugh!!
EMBARRASSING MEDICAL EXAMS
1. A man comes into the ER and yells . . .'
My wife's going to have her baby in the cab.' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs - - -
and I was in the wrong one.
Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald ,
San Francisco
2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'Big breaths,'. . . I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . .replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes ,
Seattle , WA
3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal fart.'
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg
4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications.. ' Which one ?' .. . I asked. 'The patch... The Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it !' I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body!
Now, the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair ,
Norfolk , VA
5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?' After a look of complete confusion she answered . . .. ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson-
Corvallis , OR
6. I was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I asked . . .' So how's your breakfast this morning?' ' It's very good except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste.'. .. . Bob replied. I then asked to see the jelly and Bob produced a foil packet labeled 'KY Jelly.'
Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf ,
Detroit ,
7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered . . . It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it there was a tattoo that read . . ..' Keep off the grass.' Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said 'Sorry . . . had to mow the lawn.'
Submitted by RN no name,
AND FINALLY!! ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..
8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB. I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams.. To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said. . . ' I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?'
She replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard . . . ' No doctor but the song you were whistling was . . .' I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner .' '
Dr. wouldn't submit his name....
1 MORE
Baby's First Doctor Visit
This made me laugh out loud. I hope it will give you a smile!
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. 'Breast-fed,' she replied.. 'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.
She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'
I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, But I'm glad I came.
So I received this email this past week and thought it was hilarious. Hopefully it makes you laugh!!
EMBARRASSING MEDICAL EXAMS
1. A man comes into the ER and yells . . .'
My wife's going to have her baby in the cab.' I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs - - -
and I was in the wrong one.
Submitted by Dr. Mark MacDonald ,
San Francisco
2. At the beginning of my shift I placed a stethoscope on an elderly and slightly deaf female patient's anterior chest wall. 'Big breaths,'. . . I instructed. 'Yes, they used to be,'. . .replied the patient.
Submitted by Dr. Richard Byrnes ,
Seattle , WA
3. One day I had to be the bearer of bad news when I told a wife that her husband had died of a massive myocardial infarct. Not more than five minutes later, I heard her reporting to the rest of the family that he had died of a 'massive internal fart.'
Submitted by Dr. Susan Steinberg
4. During a patient's two week follow-up appointment with his cardiologist, he informed me, his doctor, that he was having trouble with one of his medications.. ' Which one ?' .. . I asked. 'The patch... The Nurse told me to put on a new one every six hours and now I'm running out of places to put it !' I had him quickly undress and discovered what I hoped I wouldn't see. Yes, the man had over fifty patches on his body!
Now, the instructions include removal of the old patch before applying a new one.
Submitted by Dr. Rebecca St. Clair ,
Norfolk , VA
5. While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, 'How long have you been bedridden?' After a look of complete confusion she answered . . .. ' Why, not for about twenty years - when my husband was alive.'
Submitted by Dr. Steven Swanson-
Corvallis , OR
6. I was performing rounds at the hospital one morning and while checking up on a man I asked . . .' So how's your breakfast this morning?' ' It's very good except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste.'. .. . Bob replied. I then asked to see the jelly and Bob produced a foil packet labeled 'KY Jelly.'
Submitted by Dr. Leonard Kransdorf ,
Detroit ,
7. A nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room when a young woman with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of tattoos, and wearing strange clothing, entered . . . It was quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green and above it there was a tattoo that read . . ..' Keep off the grass.' Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said 'Sorry . . . had to mow the lawn.'
Submitted by RN no name,
AND FINALLY!! ! . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ..
8. As a new, young MD doing his residency in OB. I was quite embarrassed when performing female pelvic exams.. To cover my embarrassment I had unconsciously formed a habit of whistling softly.
The middle-aged lady upon whom I was performing this exam suddenly burst out laughing and further embarrassing me. I looked up from my work and sheepishly said. . . ' I'm sorry. Was I tickling you?'
She replied with tears running down her cheeks from laughing so hard . . . ' No doctor but the song you were whistling was . . .' I wish I was an Oscar Meyer Weiner .' '
Dr. wouldn't submit his name....
1 MORE
Baby's First Doctor Visit
This made me laugh out loud. I hope it will give you a smile!
A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. 'Breast-fed,' she replied.. 'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered.
She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. You don't have any milk.'
I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, But I'm glad I came.
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